Why do we self hate?

I was talking to my mother this weekend (I will write this as I know she refuses to read my blog) and she talked about interviewing an indian, only how he did not "look indian".  I know she raises these issues for her own weird reasons but I also have to wonder, is there some self hating there?  For so many years she was told to hide what she was and take refuge in the blue eyes that she can no longer see that others may have moved beyond that into a self acceptance?  At pow wow this weekend the whole range of skin colours was shown.  Even in our family, we had on person with a nice tan and the other with blisters.  I wish she could move beyond those labels and look at what people are bringing to the table rather than what they look like