Thursday, November 30, 2023

Teachings from a Branch

Last year, in the awakening time of Maskwa (Bear 2022) I picked up a stick because it made me it think it had something it wanted to teach me.

This stick has fallen from the tree - probably not where it wanted to be. It's got skin peeling off and I could see the tender insides - some of them dried out already from the sun and the wind. Some of them are still wet and raw. As I think about this stick - maybe I'm like that stick.  Maybe I wanted to be up on the tree this year. I wanted to have branches and leaves and become part of foundation of that tree. I wanted to have the birds to come sit and the squirrels - but that wasn't for me and that wasn't my path.

 

The stick is on the ground and it's waiting. Maybe it's worrying – maybe its mother tree is welcoming it back, but it's hard and it's gonna take a long time for the Earth to bring that stick home again and to be with the rest of his relatives.  But maybe that tree didn't know and now it's in my hand. Maybe that branch has a whole different path - a path that it couldn't have imagined while it was on the tree.  A path to become a part of something beautiful – a toy or an art price or even just a stick for one of our canine brothers. Maybe this stick didn't know how much of a lesson it had to share with us. Ho.

Dream of the Grandmothers

Some nights past, after spending time with Cheryl (Maskwa Kôhkomwiy / Bear’s Grandmother) talking about economic reconciliation, I heard the Kôhkomwata/Grandmothers in the dream spaces. They spoke in one voice and echoed the answers given to us by Elder Barb almost five years ago when we spoke about the practicalities of writing the “Daring to Meet the Bear” paper. I had asked for her guidance on the time period and scope of the policy paper. Her response was simple.

“Listen to what the people have already told you.”

“Go back to the beginning.”

I also felt the Kôhkomach/Grandmothers remind us to find answers in the practical, a teaching first gifted to Maskwa (Bear) by Elder Solomon in our third year. I understood how these answers continue to hold the same truth as when they were first spoken.

I woke to a small sliver of Grandmother Moon illuminating my sleeping space. I thought about how using a principals/risk based approach to meet the policy challenges of the pandemic had allowed our programs to be nimble, to respond to changing situations and unique regional needs. I thought of how, since the authorities we received were “to fill gaps” in mainstream programming, that allowed us to think about our programs in new ways and to address outstanding GBA+ concerns with our funding. I thought about what we know about our current programs and related challenges. I thought about how most of our resources go directly to communities already and I thought about what we could do if we could focus on building a bridge of economic healing, reconciliation rooted in a truth telling about Indigenous economies. Could that allow us to bypass the many binaries we face in the current framing of Indigenous economic development? (Such as high/low capacity, western ideas about time, risk tolerance) I wondered if the recommendations of the Bear Paper might have some other ideas on how to build the infrastructures we need to support ISC to meet it’s goals of service transfer and implement economic reconciliation. I thought about the abundance of tools in the innovation world and the opportunities they might provide to try new things and work differently with Indigenous partners to build sustainable and mutual capacity. I thought of wisdom and knowledges of the Ancestors that we have forgotten or put aside – the richness of thinking on these issues we are gifted if we take time to learn.

Most of all I thought of the people (oysin kitayame/ All my relations). Those we work for and with. Of those who were and will be. The people who hold the wisdom of their Grandparents. I share these words for the Bear Bundle and those who are and will join into the Bear Circle. Ho Pehiw/ Nipon Kona

“Who am I too question?”

“Who am I too question?”
I am the DNA of resistance
Irish radicals
Wanting change
War women
Wanting peace
Learners
Seeking new stories
Prisoner women
Pushed to knowledges
Prisoned letter men
Who did not break
Free folk
Who did not forget
Proud women
Unafraid of firsts
Men of machines
Women of quilt memory
I am adaptation
I am logic and needle
I am born to questions
I am Metis.

NanaBjörn Preparing 23

Tuesday, November 28, 2023

Breaking da news

They knows the news
Afore it happens
Gonna
Re-vo-lu-tionize
De government.

Follow the leader
Pied Piper
Lures
Vermin
En
Children
Which
Got you
In a lather?

Pay your 30 silver
Join ma tour
Dem dirty
Ottawa streets
Shure
Hide
Sum secrets
Cause dirt…
She’s got a long memory.
Old as stories
Each note
Medicated

Thought Sesame Street
Was documentary
“Wanna buy a letter?”
Still think of Vanna,
To try to remember
Vowel
Or
CONSANANT?

A-E-I-O-U words
But the kids got wise
Details don’t matter
When fire is at the door
Who’s got time to spin the wheel?

Gotta reclaim
Our places
Our people
Our monsters
Our songs.

I seed the future
Flute
Turns fife*
Gather peoples
To make news
They can’t imagine yet.

 

NanaBjörn Preparing 23

* History of flute/fife

ᓭᐁᐧᐱᒋᑲᐣ Sewepicikan (Telephone in Cree)

I love that phone
modernity embodied
western time
capitalist capture
has learned
"Ninanaskomowin"
and
corrects my spelling.

NanaBjörn Preparing 23

Voted most likely to wear a lime green hat

Sometimes
I wear black
I know Grandmas
You taught me different

But
Black is power
Black is armor
Black is invisible
You know it!

Bought
Black
Suit
To become.

The took it off.

Weren’t married white either

READ

Like Nana

Black to playgrounds
Black to world shut downs
“What are you gonna do meetings?”
Yoga pants and t-shirt realness

Sometimes
I wear black
But
Not
Without
Conversations
With Nanas’
And Kookums.

Pehiw Prepaing 23

Monday, November 27, 2023

A Grandma’s abundance.

Bear’s Grandmother
Steel cabinet
Silk scarf
Showing up
Listening
Asking

Straw hat
Pow—wow realness
Strawberry drink
Grass policy retreat

First ever Day of Truth and Reconciliation
We witnessed
Mohawk
Bear Clan Grandmother Prophesy
Generations of work
Star time only

Bear’s Grandmother
Do you dance in all 11 dimensions?
Gladiola
Machinery of government

Nurture
Tomato
Budget sub-missions
Cedar sore throat
Truth
To power
And all that.

Apple butter
Big spoon
Bear likes cinnamon too!
Knows your love.
A Grandma’s abundance.

Pehiw – Preparing 2023
For CS (Maskwa Kôhkomwiy / Bear’s Grandmother)

Thursday, November 16, 2023

Introduction to “Models of Indigenous Development” Edited by Ian Skelton and Octavio Ixtacuy Lopez

 Models of Indigenous Development” considers different models of indigenous development and provides examples of development as a means of resistance.  Of particular interest for me was the discussion on the need to decolonize planning.  Various essays in this volume ask us to consider if using Western ideas of planning can lead to anything but a replication of Western ideas of economic success.

Similar to the critiques around the role of accounting in reproducing certain economic norms, this volume argues that there is a need to decolonize the tool of planning as part of positioning it within Indigenous methodologies.  This analysis also makes me think about the need for a further analysis of the tools used in economic development to determine where these tools need to be reconsidered for their neutrality and/or the need to rethink how to indigenize some of these tools.

What other analysis tools do we need to reconsider with the indigenous lens? 

Wednesday, November 15, 2023

Teachings from Sister Duck

 One day I sat down on the sand near the river.  While I sat I was visited by a duck sister (ᓰᓰᑊ sîsîp - Cree).  She came boldly to me.  She knows that the two legged ones bring food.  She came close and when I did not give her food she nipped at my toes pausing in between pecks to meet my gaze and remind me of my duty.  I looked deep into her in her eyes and after some time we came to an understanding.  She stopped nipping and sat down to guard me from any other feathered visitors.

We sat together as family. Arms and legs pulled in, ears alert to the environment but at ease.  Briefly she wandered off to play a goose game but shook that off.  She knows what she is.  She knows that Geese games are not the ones for her today.  She reminded me of the lessons of currents and winds in our lives.  She reminded me of the duck’s ability to adjust themselves and slough off the water from their feathers. She reminded me of living as a creature on land and water and sky.  She reminded me to share my gifts and inhabit my natural spaces.  In her tellings she returned me to the lessons of taking time to sit down and listen.  I thank her for the visit. 

What lessons have the crawling, flying and swimming relations brought you?

Thursday, November 9, 2023

To new callouses

It is hard to weave
Silent shuttle
Dusty frame
No source of fiber
No one
Got the know how!

Dry your tears
Those Grandmas still speak

Find the first ones
Learn their lessons

Find those who made it better
Those that know
All the things
To watch
To correct

First go
It’s awkward
Hands clumsy
Light the medicines
Connect to all those layers

Calloused thumbs
Scarred fingers
You are them

A fiber

Weak alone
Together
Entwined
Fit to robe our smallest

A story in every crossing

Each
Warp

Each 
Weft

We need each remembered
Each trier
Each hoper

Even though this really sucks right now
Our story is you.

Pehiw 2022

Cold spots

Those “cold” spots
White hot hate
Cause I don’t remember

But I know

For everything
All the memories
Draped in textures/taste/sense

There I have none

Senseless
Scarred tissue
Mind protects.

 

Pehiw Wandering 2022

Tuesday, November 7, 2023

This is an ugly poem: Grizzly math

It is a grizzly math
which notation?
what risk margins deemed acceptable?
standardize my assumptions
-reported annual deaths -
4%*

Too many
no matter the calculation.

Did you draft letters?
Or not even care?
form letter?
postcard?
"kid dead"
prepared speech
or silence?

Why do many dead
first day?
Run aways?
Suicide?
Worse?
Who were you?.
I remember you only as old lady
aghast
as we perched high
you wanted us down
for safety or punishment?
That is lost to time
and the maths you prefer.

Bear Vision

Know
I don’t take your trust for granted
All ancestors welcome here
Re-con-ciliation
Needs us all
Healing needs a full circle
We hold the space
The all
Not matter when you joined this story
Here
Or distant lands
Join the abundance
Share your truths
On Turtles back
Re-claim
Your ways
Your wisdom
In circle
In trust
Like knows like

Pehiw Wandering 2022
With a ninanaskomowin (ceremonial thank you) to all the Elders and Ancestors

Blood and Soft Stiches

“You pulled me together with blood and Soft Stiches” *
Thank you
Kookums
Mooshums
Medicines made people

You learned to stich
So careful
That mending
A new thing lives!

We tell
Secrets of the dark
You know already
Details not needed.
And you still love

To you
We are not broken people
Sometimes
You add fabric
From unsayable times
To strength
Frayed places
To return us to work
To mending our medicines
A hope
Not a bandage
To cover
Or a scar hidden in shame
Some places much strong. 

They lied to keep us quiet
The grandma’s come to unstaple our tongues
The Grandpas
Give hard truths
Tell us breathe

You already know
That impossible reality
“Stop doubting”
Your deep knowing
You are not shame
You are not broken
Just need time in the mending basket.

Pehiw Wandering 2022
* Keaton Henson “The Pugilist” to Auntie W