Thursday, May 28, 2015

Like a salmon egg

Photograph from the Blog "Get me Outdoors"
I am pretty down this week.  Lots of things to think about around work and family life.  Lots of things not working and I need to question carefully if this is my dark view on things or a need to change.   As a person with anxiety I have tried to keep close to my heart the idea that "today is not everyday".  To stay very aware that  how I feel in the moment is changeable and I can't always trust myself in the moment when the feeling are so big.  But on the other hand, I am paid for my skills to analyze problems and find solutions.  I can pull apart a problem and dissect it with vigor.

I am trying to think of myself as a salmon egg being buffered by the currents of the stream.  I am going to have to do something in the future, but at the moment I just need to be, to keep breathing.  I need to quiet those voices that I should be happy given how much I have compared to others.  Am I just being unreasonable in my expectations?  I just feel like there is so much more I can do.  I am just going to let the water flow over me...

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