Friday, May 29, 2015

There are some places nature should not go....

I had been planning to write a post about maintaining connection to nature is difficult living in the city.  I was going to write about how hard it is, without a car, to get out and be in wild spaces.  But then I had an experience last night that made me see that what I want is really a nice sanitized and controlled version of nature.  I want a "nature experience" not nature.

Mouse Woman by Dean Hunt
I woke up after feeling something crawling up my thighs and trying to burrow into my vagina, followed shortly by a cat hunting said something.  The cat clued me in that this was not the usual spider lost in the sheets but something more interesting.  I turned on the light to find a very confused mouse and annoyed cat. 
Mouse Woman with Dean Hunt
This experience made me think, that while I want more of a "connection" with nature, I do not want it in my bed or being dead near me.  I want lush landscapes not dry woodlands, I want, I want....I am expectation for "experience".  I am not open to take the wild as it comes.  Maybe bringing death or dryness or cold.  I want it to be tidy and not challenge me.  I realized that I am not open to the lessons that are there for me to learn.  I am not open to the cycle of nature and the circles it brings to us.  The circles we live out in our lives. I think that perhaps since I would not go out to nature, mouse woman brought her lessons to me. 

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