In lieu of being the kind of person that does not make assumptions about others, I try to build reminders into my life that this behavior is harmful. The woman in the picture is one of my reminders. In my childhood home, we spent a lot of time envying people who seemed to have it all. What was on the surface was the reality and we hoped that one day we could be those people without any troubles and with lots of money and interesting jobs. Even when the cracks were clear, someone had cancer or lost a job, it was just glossed over. Poor us.
As an adult, I am aware that the outside tells us little about the inside of a person. The perfect person can be in an abusive relationship or have a troubled past or be sick. I am aware that the more we tell our stories we allow ourselves to grow and we support one another as we go through things. I am aware that judging based on someone's hair color or job is not helpful to supporting meaningful adult relationships.
Maegan is my reminder of that. She is a DIY blogger that I liked to follow. She is blond and beautiful, lives in a cool house in LA and has a job in a gallery. She is the perfect outside to our society. But Maegan is also a real person, who shares her challenges with infertility on her blog. Looking at her picture it is easy to dismiss her as a person who I would have nothing in common with but with the layer of story, she is a multidimensional person who is sharing her difficult journey. Her honesty inspires others to tell their stories and we are all better because of that.