I am reading a book about co-dependency "Co-dependent No More" and I got stuck on this quote
"Codependents are reactionaries. They overreact. They under-react. But rarely do they act. They react to the problems, pains, lives and behaviors or others. They react to their own problems, pains and behaviors. Many codependent reactions are reactions to stress and uncertainty of living or growing with alcoholism and their problems. It is normal to react to stress. It is not necessarily abnormal, bit it is heroic and life saving to learn how to not react and act in more healthily ways"
This really hit me. I spend a lot of time reacting and little acting. The thoughts and worries stay inside and wander through my body creating chaos. I am sometimes surprised that the world seemed so normal when such a storm has gone through me. Afterwards I feel ashamed and weak. Nothing outside has changed, but I am diminished. I am thinking on these things. Thinking about how to act and not just react.